WTF!?

WTF! I am the only mother in New York that hasn’t lost the baby weight! At least that’s how I feel after doing my first ‘Mommy and Baby Dance Class’ with James today. I kid you not, the other mothers of 4 to 7 month-olds in the class are skinnier than I was before I got pregnant! I’m a size four right now but next to these Mamas I’m obese. Yes, I have had the odd terrible moment post-delivery of scarfing down three chocolate bars in a row, but I also eat a lot of salads! I swim twice a week, walk the dog, I’ve done some jogging and I exercised when I was pregnant…Yet, I am miles away from my pre-baby weight. In fact, getting changed before the dance class today I was shocked by my own reflection in the mirror – Its true what they say: “your body really does change with pregnancy.” OR DOES IT?! How have these mothers managed to stay a size zero – or double zero, triple zero!? Doctors tell you that you should gain on average 25-35 pounds during pregnancy, so what’s the deal? Ok, it is possible to loose 24 pounds in 6 months if you’re loosing a pound a week but are these new moms dieting? I’m breastfeeding so the idea of dieting kind of scares me: what if I don’t get enough calories or nutrients for my baby? Some doctors even recommend you eat a couple hundred calories more when you’re breastfeeding. So if these mamas are loosing the weight through breast-feeding they must not be taking in those extra calories. But then how are they starving off the hunger!?? Breast-feeding makes you hungrier and exhaustion makes you crave carbs so being a new mom on a diet requires super-human strength! Why am I so weak when they are so strong!? In class today, instead of being fully present and enjoying dancing with my gorgeous son, I spent too much time noticing my reflection in the class mirror. I couldn’t help grimacing at my saddle-bags, disliking my juicy thighs and feeling all that extra padding around my middle bounce on the off-beat. Worst of all, I felt like a failure. I felt like a failure because these other mamas clearly had more self-discipline than me meaning they would achieve more in life, resulting in them having more fulfilling lives. They were clearly better wives than me (because they looked hot for their husbands way before I did) and they hadn’t let pregnancy overtake them the way I had. I’d throughly enjoyed being pregnant because it was the first time in over a decade where I felt like I didn’t need to be skinny or hot. My life before baby had been about looking good (especially being an actress.) When I was pregnant it was so much easier to justify not worrying about my looks and frankly, it was very freeing. Now I wonder, did I do right? Should I have thought more about how I looked? Is gaining weight during pregnancy (and taking a year to loose it) passé?? Mamas? Daddys? Thoughts?

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12 thoughts on “WTF!?

  1. Hmmm, you may want to try asking other actresses who have been in the same boat (going from acting to motherhood and feeling exactly what you feel). Like Kellie Martin (she’s around your age)–sorry, I don’t have an e-mail address for her, but you could always try her on Twitter at @Kellie_Martin. KM has at least one actress friend, Melissa Joan Hart (@MelissaJoanHart), who is also a mother.

    There is no guarantee whatsoever that what the other mommies did to lose weight was necessarily healthy. As you may know, the country we live in is terribly image-oriented, and people will resort to ridiculous lengths to attain a certain appearance. Other than surgery, I have no idea how Kim Kardashian could have lost all her post-natal weight.

  2. Arthur says:

    I think it’s wonderful that you’re putting so much into being a mother, and I have to wonder about those other skinny mothers…do they have their priorities straight? Which would you rather be, stick-skinny for appearances sake or respectably healthy with your mind on being a good mother?

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  5. Free says:

    With so many lovely and important things in your life, including but not limited to your baby, why is weight or pre-baby weight so important? Why do we care when — even if — its achieved? Buy new jeans if you need to!
    Just keep up the healthy lifestyle and let things become what they may.
    Why aren’t women allowed to be healthy and happy and just enjoy life and its pleasures guilt-free?
    Why must women starve themselves and feel ashamed of their bodies, urges and femininity?
    I think that we spend some much time being the victim of this social repression that we don’t even realize we have become perpetrators as well, furthering the concept that these esthetic standards are all a woman is about….

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