Confession? I just ate 3 chocolate bars. In a row. In five minutes!
Now, I’m all about celebrating a variety of body sizes but I don’t think we should celebrate over-eating. One chocolate bar = good, three chocolate bars = not-so-good. I just keep thinking about this upcoming red carpet (see my last blog.) Its making me miserable. The feeling that I need to loose weight makes me eat more. What about you? Its the damn ‘good day/bad day’ syndrome. I think: “I better eat all the chocolate bars today so I can start fresh tomorrow.” I know intellectually that binging is what makes you gain weight but sometimes when I start over-eating its really hard to stop.
Another confession: I don’t want to loose the weight slowly! I want to loose it fast! I want to do a cleanse! I want to drink maple-syrup-cayenne-pepper-water for a week, all the while being a complete psycho bitch to my husband only to wake up on the last day of the cleanse a few pounds lighter (my husband will forgive me!) But my baby will not. I’m a mom now. I’m breast-feeding. I can’t in good conscience do a cleanse – my baby needs more nourishment than that – hell, I need more nourishment than that.
I need to meditate or something, get my act together. I’ve got to accept myself 20 pounds heavier, cellulite on the front and back of my legs… ACCEPT. MYSELF. Because as long as I restrict certain foods, I want them more. Anyone out there going through the same thing? Any Superbowl binges? Another confession: I didn’t watch the Superbowl. I watched Real Housewives instead : )